at the entrance of farewell

I'm staying at Sony's team room today.
He has such a comfortable room to live in
to cry in
to laugh in
to smile at
Why didn't I realize that before?

How I dearly wish I can just fast forward this.
or rewind it all back.
I know it's stupid but I'm glad there's nobody in this room other than me.
I must have look like hell

Naah....
I think I look decent enough,
even now.

But I'm still glad nobody's here
coz I will confuse them.
They would wonder what happen
"Is there anything wrong?"
"what's the matter?"
they will ask me.

and there's nothing I can say to answer them

It's such an unwise thing to consider your team as your family.

It's so unwise to have feelings for them, affection, though apart from love.

How I love my team so much

I can't afford to let them go.

It's a childish feelings, I know, but it would have been so lovely to spend the rest of this day to let them go....to cry as long as possible. So that as tomorrow when I can see them again, they won't get to see this sobbing face. How lovely if on that day I'm already able to consider them otherwise, to not miss, to not long, to think that it's nothing to part. (gee how it sounds like a terrible lie I keep telling myself)

Tomorrow is just another day

and the coming of tomorrow might just mean the nearer I get to the day when I won't see them again. It's been quite some days that I woke up not feeling enthusiastic about the coming day. Because I know that they will not be around anymore.

How funny
At first you think that it is YOU who help them passing the days.
but at the end of everything, ...it's actually THEM who help you getting through the days....that it is almost unimaginable to spend the day without without thinking of them.

and yes. Even AD. I think I too will miss AD (though he's such a flirt! The kind of man you want to runaway from). I'm glad he's not occupying this room right now...'coz if he's here, maybe I would just cry in front of him (though I logically think it's not a wise thing to do).

I'm sooooo....STUPID!

Yet then again I think it's a wise thing to cry here and now, so tomorrow I can be a better person who smiles all day long without feeling so deceitful for smiling on the entrance of farewell. Yes I love them...and so what. They will stay in my mind, for the rest of eternity. And I will still love them, no matter where they are.

Because friendship....is in the heart.

and so as love.